Things will be what they will be

Sometimes there are things that you cannot change. There is nothing that you can do about it. Sooner or later things will be put into place and all come together, maybe not in the way you expected but in a way that was meant to be.  It may not be the easiest path to get there but you will get there no matter what. Right now i am feeling very confused. About a lot of things. College,school, family, friends, myself, faith,..everything! I jut am not sure where i stand anymore. Im not sure what i am suppose to be doing. Where i am suppose to be going. I feel like this summer is going to be a good time for me. Im ready for a break. I need a break from drama from stress and just to relax and have fun and have no worries. I wish things we just easier to understand sometimes. I wish i literally could see the answers right in front of my face instead of having to decide what i am suppose to do and what is right. Also i am scared.. I have lately gotten a feeling of being scare to grow up. I use to be excited to grow up and start my life on my own and be out in the real world. But now things have changed. I dont want to grow up. Seeing all the seniors b done with school makes me nervous. I like it because now i am the oldest but i do not like it because i know i will bn their spot in a year from now. I want to stay in high school forever, not literally forever but you know what i mean. It is somewhere where all my decisions are pretty much made for me. I think im scared because i dont want to make a choice on my own and have it be the wrong one. And have it be a big decision and the choice i choose be one that i cannot change. One that i cannot fix. And one that i cannot go back and change or get a redo and go back and pick the other one. I dont know about you but this really scares me. I just hope things change soon because i dont like the way that things are now. I need things to fall into place soon!

Faith!

Hello. Well on sunday it was my confirmation at my church. One of the things we have to do in order to become confirmed is to write your faith statement. Then on easter sunday we all get to be lucky enough to read them out loud in front on almost a billion people. Okay well not a billion but it felt like it! Not only was there a bunch of people that make me nervous but also my faith statement was the longest. It took up the front,back of a sheet and yet another paragraph on another sheet. Lucky me!! Well everything ended up fine except for a fee minor mistakes but it went pretty smoothly.i just wanted to share my faith statemnt with my whole 5 followers:) (sorry if it gets to be long but inhad alot to say) I believe in God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit and i believe that they are one. I believe that God sent his one and only son to die for us and we should be forever thankful for this. I believe God knows each and everyone of us personally and that He has an exact plan for us to lead us to our purposes in life. I know that He is always in my heart with me. I believe he would never give us more than we can handle without him. I beieve God knows everything and He helps guide my decisions. He helps me stay on the right path. I believe he loves me no matter what. I beieve God calls on us to be his disciples and share the good word to those who dont know about it. I believe he gave us all specific gifts and talents in order for us all to do that. I believe that Jesus Chirst wS concieved by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, and was crusified, dead, and buried. I believe on the third day he rose again and assended into heaven. I believe now he is seated at the the right hand of the Father. I believe he will come again to judge the living and the dead. I believ through Jesus's death that we are able to recieve grace. I believe our personal relationship with Jesus Christ allows us to recieve forgivness through communion. I believe the bread symbolizes his body and the wine his blood. The act of communion is done in rememberance of him. I believe the Holy Spirit lives within our hearts. I believe the Holy Spirit holds me up when i am falling down. I believe the Holy Spirit gives me strength to do the things that seem impossible. I believe that the Holy Spirit brings to my attention those decisions the make me christlike. I believe God created the church so that everyone can have a place to congergatte and grow in their faith. I believe church is the body of chirst, not just a building ehere people come together to socialize. I grew up going to church from a very young age. I believe that this has benefitted me in every way. Some of those ways are learning about the bible and its stories from sunday school, chatechism, and youth group and singing praise songs. When i got older i wanted to learn even more so i joined a bible study. All of these things have helped me grow in my faith tremendesly. Even the people in church have influenced me such as pastor don, todd, pam, my parents and family, my mentor carin, my past sunday school and chatechism teachers, as well as other members of the congergation. I feel so blessed to belong to such a loving church with people who are so willing to help, uphold, and guide eachother in all ways. I believe prYer is such a powerful thing. God really hears them and acts on them. I believe to repent is not only to feel sorry but it is to try and turn the situation around. I believe faith means believeing, trusting, and doing. When i think of this it reminds me of the bible verse Hebrews 11:1 " now faith is being sur of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" to me this means that we need to believe and trust in him and show it by doing zgods will. I believe the ten command,ents ae not suggestions but expectations he gave us to live by. I believe go gave us toold such as the bible, church, and fellow christians to help us grow in our faith. I look forward to strengthening my relationship with god and have his guidance in the decisions i will have to make as a young adult and for the rest of my life.

My new playlist.

Ok. I am challanging myself to listen to christian music for a while. I am wanting soething more than ghe same old rap where all they seem to be talking about it drugs, sex, stealing, violence, and pain. I want something more on the lines of love, courage, determination, imperfections are okay, acceptance, forgivnes and the list goes on. Im going to just keep updating this post with new songs that i find and like and if you like them too check them out :)or if you have any suggestions for me please comment!

>remind me who i am...jason gray
>Motions...matthew west
>you are more..tenth avenue north
>Courageous...casting crowns
>broken and beautiful....mark schultz
>Always...kristian stanfill
>Hero..superchick
>wispers in the dark...skillet


More to come!

Round Two

Alright, well here is to round two! I sort of gave up on blogging but i got a sudden burst of energy that i should just try it again. Here we go....
Well today i was getting kind of bored in goverment class today and i let my mind wander. I started to think of. My past and how good thing were when we were back in elementary school and our biggest problem was being th efirst one to the back of the bus to claim a spot. I miss those easy days. Now we ahve tons of problems. If its not one thing it is the other. I never seem to catch a break this year. Its really frustrating. I want things to change! I hope blogging will help me just relate to others and just talk about it weather my 4 followers acctually care to read or not. :)
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Change is good.

Lst year my church went to rocky mountain high in colorado. It was the timeof my life and i felt as though i was as close to god that as i ever have been before. I loved it. Now i feel farther apart than ever. I just sort of took the reins to my own life and thought that i could do it on my own. That thats is a total joke. I relized very quickly that i need him in my life every moment of it. That isone ofthe things i wanttochange. I use to read my bible Almost every night and pray. Now its a rare occurance if that happens. So tonight i started. I just opend it up and started reading. Im not going to explain everything that i red but lets just say he knew what was on my mind and he found a way to provide me with the reassurance i needed. I oove the little things liek that. I want them to happen more often.
Also tonight at my youth group my youth pastor made the statment. "if you are not a christian by the age 16 then the likelyhood that you love a christian life decreases by 70%. That really scared me. I dont want to be just another statistic like that.mi want to prove that wrong. :)

Classroom Buddy!

So today was my first day of being a classroom buddy! I go with the first graders at east. They are so cute. Today for some reason it was crazy hat and sock day and it was reaooy funny. Some cute little girl had a flamingo hat tht ent like 2 feet in the air. The kid behind her had to lean way over to see. It was so funny. Anyways i think i might really like doing this becasue when i got there they were practicing speoling words and they were making the cutest mistakes. They would all line upj at the chalkboard and write it out. One time all of them looked at one little kids and theyall made the same mistakes..(theymbetter practice more for high school so they dont make it so obvious). I was helping this little girl and she was the cutest. She told me her grandma called her fat and i didnt know what to say back. I was thinking aww thats a crazy old grandma. Haha. Anyways this just got me t hinking that i might want to be a teacher or a paraprofessional in schoolmwhen i get older(just a thought).

Smooth Sailing:)

Hello fellow bloggers! Well this is my first blog ever! So i will give it a shot and see how it goes. What im feeling right now is total happiness!:) have you ever had the feeling that everything is going just the way you want? I am, im felling it right now. For the past few weeks everything has just came together and its just been smooth sailing! Ive just recently felt that i have accomplished a closer relationship with God. We just got a new bible that is suppose to help us be able to read it in a total of one year. Im so excited to accept the challange but i have told myself that i have to wait for the beginning of the new year to start. Also my family and i are closer than ever before. My mom was just recently in a car accident. She is totally fine (praise God) but it really gave me a new outlook that what if something would have gone wrong and she wouldnt be here today. <3 Also my sister and her husband are super hilarious to be with. Recently i have been showing them up in a game called phase 10! My brother and his fiance are Planning their wedding. This makes me soo excited! :) also my friends and i have become tighter than a fat girl in spandex:). I love hanging out with them and having deep discussions and crazy movie marathons. My current place of employment is going decent. I really like my co-workers. We always seem to find a way to make work fun! School is also going swell. Im maintaining good grades and loving my classes. This year has gone by so fast already but thats okay with me im so ready to be a senior! Well that about sums it up for now! Im just hoping that this is not like the old saying. "what goes up must come down" :) Ta-ta for now:)